What is your age? Under 18 Years Old 18 to 24 Years Old 25 to 30 Years Old 31 to 40 Years Old 41 to 50 Years Old 51 to 60 Years Old Over 60 Years Old What is your gender? Male Female Do you go down town? No way! If I'm drunk On special occasions All d'time! Do you play with yourself? Umm... Eew! I tried it once Only if I haven't gotten any in a long, long, long time... Oh yeah! Whould you let me play the back 9? What? Since I don't know what that is... no Oh HELL NO! I would let you try to do it, but it will not open up for you. I am a tease! Only when I am really, really drunk... like passed out drunk Maybe on your birthday I INSIST on it Do you own any toys? And I don't mean leggos. Well, I have a Teddy Bear... I got one as a gag gift for my birthday I have a lil' one I rarely use I have a "few" Would you let me use toys on you? Um, I said I don't have any I only use them on myself because you are not here Of course, if you want to Oh...ooh... That would be hot Could I use non-convetional toys/props in the bedroom? OK, for the 3rd time... NO TOYS SICKO! Um... Is an intimate massager non-conventional? I guess we could try strawberries or something Let's buy some corn and cucumbers tonight! Want to get tied up? OK, when is this going to end? I am so offended I guess you could tie hair in a bun or something We could try cuffs or something, if you really want, but don't expect it often buddy I have the cuffs, you supply the leather cop outfit! What stuffed animal do you like to fantasize was real and your best friend in the magic kingdom? I don't have an imagination My stuffed puppy, because I love puppies My stuffed monkey... My stuffed elephant, because it reminds me of you. And I would give him a big, special kiss! Do you leave your cell phone on during special time, and take calls? After this quiz, you ain't gettin' no special time That would be rude All the time Only because I know you secretly think it is kinky when I talk to my family during our special time... What do the tips of your special elbows look like? Huh? Marbles Tiny, tiny sunny side up eggs, with the yolks torn Chocolate gumdrops Can we still have special time during your visit from Aunt Flow? Ok you lost me now... EEW!!!! Only if it is our aniversary Of course, I need my special time Would you wear a cute outfit for me in public? You mean like a full length evening gown Blue jeans and a T-shirt are cute, right? I'd wear a mini skirt. Of course I define a mini skirt as one that goes up to your knee One Halloween I am going to surprise you with the red outfit with the special tail. And no underthings somethimes when we go to the clubs Will you wear an even cuter outfit for me in private? Like my full length robe, slippers, full length PJs, curlers and face cream? No way, tha tis too revealing! What #1 said, but I would wear it I have a cute nighty I can wear How does a schoolgirl outfit, with edible g-string, sound? Would you let me watch you touching yourself? You mean like when my hads touch eachother while I am washing them? I don't touch myself That is private! Break out the movie camera, you are in for a serious show Could I watch you "relaxing" in a jacuzzi? I don't like jacuzzis That is private Only if you pay for the fancy hotel room Bust out your scuba gear, your in for a show Did this quiz have too many questions? Too many, and they were offensive too! Yeah, it was pretty boring Naw, it was still better than being at work No way. Actually, it made me hot. I am going to call you now and let you hear while I touch something
