How Huge Is Your Epeen?

So, here is the first version of the "How Huge Is Your Epeen?" test. Anyone can run themselves through it and it may even reveal some things about yourself you didn't realize. Even better, this could be the first step in curing your N.E.D.s if you're so afflicted :D

With so much peen laying around this virtual sausage shop of a community, one must at times wonder just how their epeen measure up. So, without further adieu, I give you the test:

Created by: loserl

GoToQuiz Presents...
Our "Big Five" Personality Assessment Quiz!

Upon losing a duel, you:
- Grimace and admit to the person they got the better of you, but often mention knowing of a method that would allow you to beat them in time.
- Immediately make excuses for why you lost, often inserting some random insult(s).
- Bow and thank the person for the duel.
- Attempt to lure the player into a "best of" series of matches.
When you get killed by two low level players who you underestimated in a battleground, you generally:
- Freak out and blame your team for not being there, often resulting in your /afk-ing out of the match. Sometimes you stay to get revenge when they're alone.
- Shrug the noobing off and maybe send a /salute or some form of commendation emote the next time you run across the player, or even make them a "Good fight" post to show your sportsmanship.
- Shake your head and sit and ponder the situation while waiting for the spirit healer to resurrect you, then return to focusing on your normal objectives.
- Begin to fume offline, thinking of all the things you should have done differently and making sure to single the lowbies out throughout the remainder of the match to prove to them that they were obviously just lucky the first time.
When someone on the forums talks trash about you, your most common response is:
- Read the post then make a defensive response asking why the player is attacking you so viciously. Sometimes this involves complimenting them on their skill and trying to smooth things over. Almost always, you make sure to state that you hadn't done anything to them to incite such an attack.
- Engage the original post with question, listing a small set of accomplishments that will certainly help the critic see the error of their ways. At times, these turn into bruised ego flame wars, but the original intention was simply to defend your honor and maybe help your accuser of suck remember that time you and your team killed them when they had the flag in Warsong several months back.
- Charge into text based warfare, unleashing the pure power of your nerd rage on the ignorance of any who might even consider talking down the painfully raw skills you possess within the game. Often, these bouts of rage are expressed in the form of caps lock and incredibly bad grammar, peppered with really bad insults your six year old sister would groan at.
- Laugh in good humor at the attention and obvious troll attempt, sometimes in text and sometimes without even bothering to respond. Shrugging it off, you return to knowing your own worth.
You're fighting a player who started without a partner in the arena while your partner sits out. As your health begins to reach dangerously low levels, the thought that goes through your mind is:
- If I'm going to lose, at least I put up a good fight and this guy is an awesome player.
- Figures my partner would expect me to go first, then they can kill this guy once all his cooldowns are blown on me.
- Help me you floating piece of noob excrement!!! I can't be seen losing to this guy!!!
- Dammit, I might be in danger of getting noobed by this guy.
When a guild member suggests, indirectly, that they are better than you at playing the game, you are most likely to:
- Smirk at this comment and the fallout and wonder what causes some people to become such peenerheads. At some point you state something that has nothing to do with the in-guild epeen face slapping contest in an effort to get the guild back to normal and hint that some people just don't care.
- Approach the topic calmly, reminding the player in question of the things you and other members of the guild do well. As the conversation moves forward, you attempt to keep from arguing while trying to get the offensive player to admit the rest of you are pretty good players as well.
- Engage the player in a heated discussion, attempting to point out all the reasons they're not as good as the twinks of your friends who have a good level of recognition in the bracket. Using this strategy, you don't get pulled into the trap of "DUEL ME!!!" against a class you're not supposed to be able to beat, but can still list all the reasons the insulting player is not as good as they seem to think they are.
- Fly into a text based hissy fit, often coming across as effective as a frothing cave man may have back in the day. During this vulgarity riddled, sexuality questioning outburst, you manage to get two points across fairly effectively. The first being you never remember getting your *ss kicked, no matter how often or recent and second, you could win a duel fighting naked.
During a match, an opposing player or teammate offends you in some manner. You create a character on their server for the purpose of:
- Flaming the player who kicked your *ss in a text arguments and/or battleground or arena. Being the clever person you are, you put the person you're flaming on ignore so they have no chance of giving you yet another beating.
- Congratulate the player on a good fight and leave the sadness for someone else. At times you make mention of the offense in question, but only ever in a nonchalant passive joking way. This very often results in the other player apologizing and commending your efforts in the game/arena in question.
- Visiting the player to discuss the occurrence. Most times, the conversation begins with a non-hostile greeting from your end and finishes with the two of you exchanging polite goodbyes. At times, the issue at hand is laughed off by both you and the player in question regardless of the initial effects it had on you.
- Talking a situation over with the player, often being more hostile than you realize which leads to further disagreement and grade school insults. Often, the venture only frustrates you further when you receive little to no answers to your many questions, "WTF why all the /lol? You had healz!", "So why not come see me in the arena? We can settle this there. Hello? Answer me dammit!" "So you think I suck as a druid I hear, want to duel? PTR!!! Queue arena!!! For f*** sakes take me off ignore!!"
The type of screenshot you link onto the forums most often depict:
- Accomplishments of your own or your guild's that often depict the events of a game you're proud of. Often these shots are legitimate and worthy of generating pride, no matter how likely they are to enrage those who are defamed by the images. The people deserve to see the results of a good fair game, you believe.
- Pictures of anyone you dislike in compromising positions, often those who have argued with you over anything in the past. Rivalries need hard evidence to claim dominance over the other side and you have just the print screen skills to provide such evidence. Other times, you may post a screenshot of your amazing stats, hoping no one notices you were in one of those ten twinks against a team that couldn't hope to compete against five of your team members kind of games.
- Pictures you find entertaining that you believe others will enjoy just as much, such as two premades dancing in midfield during a match or an arena you competed in wearing nothing but a smile and an axe.
- Your amazing accomplishments over anyone who has ever doubted your skill, or who is highly respected by the gaming community you associate most with. Regarless of the factors that lead to their demise and especially the factors that allowed you to get said screenshot, you proclaim yourself the true ruler of all, using the screenshots as evidence of your near godhood in the game.
During an intense, evenly matched Warsong battle, a player who has very low end gear but has scored a flag in the game grabs the flag and makes it to midfield. Meeting them in midfield, do you:
- Assist the lowbie with everything you've got or attempt to get the flag back so your team can get another flag turned in believing that if the player scored once, there's a good chance he can do it again.
- Strongly suggest or ask the lowbie to hand off. If the lowbie refuses, you often make sure to comment on how they should have listened to you if they drop. If they score, they nonchalant "gg" is your path of choice, you were still right, they were just lucky the other team was just as bad.
- Command the inferior whelp to drop the flag so that you or someone you deem worthy might carry it. Legends such as yourself have no time for pitiful wannabe heroes.
- Give the lowbie the benefit of the doubt. Every player is has the potential to overachieve and you don't see the harm in giving this player room to impress everyone. If the flag happens to drop, you often make a passive comment that the player made a good effort but may want to let someone else hold next time. If they score, you begin to develop a respect for this lesser known player regardless of their outdated by twelve levels equipment.
Entering a battleground, you look around and find nothing but lower level players who are green to you, wearing the latest fashions from Lowbies R Us. You:
- You shake your head and brace yourself for a really bad game. Very rarely, you see a glimmer of hope as a few of the lowbies manage to score a flag or actually seem to be good at playing flags. All too often however, you find yourself being bent over some random stump by six of the overpowering opposition and wishing you had a teammate or two who was as well dressed and well played as yourself.
- Attempt to mold the lowbies into an effective unit, no matter how lost the cause. You call flag exits, knowing that one holy priest on the other team can effectively kill your entire 'team'. You heal/assist the lowbies as much more powerful characters gank them over and over. You encourage the grey flag runner, even when you know he likely won't outlast the first hunter pet. In the face of brutal odds, you try to stay positive believing that oen day these players could be much better with a little help.
- Demand that everyone two levels or lower than you immediate leave the game. When some refuse, a game long argument ensues between you and the entire team which helps you solidify your chances of earning the ***hold Of The Month award.
- Sigh and make a passive aggressive comment about leveling and getting teamed up with players who don't have the equipment to do anything in the battles. Often this leads to many a "who u talkin to??"s and very often leads to one or more of said lowbies pointing out every time you die as well as every mistake you make in the game. Quite often, you nerd rage out of the game via /afk before the game even begins.
A player of the same class says/posts something related to playing the class to help a newer player. You tend to:
- Enter the conversation as if you're attempting to help, while truly trying to 'improve' in the 'wrongful' tips being given by the player helping the newer player. Pretending to be objective, you talk in circles and often the conversations end with the parties involved all pretending they don't think the other is a complete and utter moron.
- You jump in and support the helpful player, often commending their abilities and knowledge about the class in question. Every so often you throw in some advice of your own, but put a disclaimer making sure everyone knows you don't cosnider yourself the authority on the class.
- Jump in and give a sermon on how to play the class 'the right way'. Anyone who disagrees with you is generally treated to some form of "You're a n00b" response, with you solidifying why your way is the only proper way to play said class.
- You jump in and add a few pointers of your own, sometimes asking the helping player to explain why they're advising to use this spec, or this piece of gear. Many times the player helping has a good reason which you ultimately come to agree with, though you often have one or two differences and state them as being preferential to you personally while respecting the advice of the original helpful player.

How Huge Is Your Epeen?

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